Category: Observations
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Mr Stationmaister
A sarcastic paean to the railway stationmaster. Barrowsgate must have been fond of this piece as it was later republished in the Buchan Observer on 02 March 1937 under the name “Anzac” and, later, in the Huntly Express in the “Observations of Jeems” column. Spoiler: the whole article is clearly just a vehicle for the…
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Fermin’ an’ Frettin’
Barrowsgate despairs at the constant pessimism shown by farmers. The Walter Elliot referred to in this Bittie was a Scottish politician who, at the time of the article, was Minister for Agriculture, Fisheries and Food. He was credited with introducing the Agricultural Marketing Act which sought to protect food producers from going bankrupt amidst surpluses…
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The Kilt
It seems slightly odd that this Bittie starts in English then switches to Doric after a paragraph. The verse at the end was also published separately the following month.
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Burns Abroad
With Burns night (25th January) approaching, Barrowsgate wonders whether the Scots fully appreciate just how influencial and loved he is the world over. He ends with his own verse of appreciation, “Nane Ither”. Places mentioned in the article (which Barrowsgate had apparently visited) are the Chilcoot Trail in British Columbia, San Francisco and Visalia in…
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The Milk Pool
Barrowsgate’s dairy cows are unhappy. Peter, the young bullock, explains that this is because the dairy farmer only gets a fraction of the cost of a pint of milk to the consumer. The cows blame the Milk Pool for setting the price that the farmer gets at too low a value, undermining the long-term viability…
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Indigestion
Barrowsgate notices that, apart from having indigestion, at this time of post-Hogmanay excess, people’s noses tend to betray them by taking on a range of red and purple colours.
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Hogmanay
In his last column of 1933, Barrowsgate reminisces about Hogmanays past, and how he often ended up having eaten too much, and his mother would have to administer castor oil. His column ends with a Hogmanay toast.
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Murder!
In his last column before Christmas 1933, Barrowsgate draws our attention to the murder that is carried on, up and down the land, at this time. He is talking about the murder of turkeys and hens for the dinner table.
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Economy – A Savin’ Disgrace
Barrowsgate thinks that “economy” is just another word for greed, and cites the example of a Mayor of London who used to make his tobacco go a long way by first chewing it, then smoking it, and then smoking the ash.